HAPPY SUNDAY!
Typing that definitely took some getting used to again. After what feels like forever (it’s been four months), I am back. That’s the longest I have gone without posting in the four years that I have had this platform. And to me that’s pretty scary. For something I value so much. For something that is a huge part of who I am, I pushed it to the side. And in the blink of an eye that push was further and further out of my reach. And all of a sudden, four months had gone by.
Seriously I don’t know where the time went. I could make excuses all day, but excuses shouldn’t get in the way of a platform I put sooo much of my heart into. I almost feel like I was all stuck in the wave of summer that I hit major writer’s block. And then the moments where I would realize how long it had been since I had written, I would get writer’s block again. Or unmotivation.
I got busy again and again and again. Between school, extracurriculars, plans, life, social butterfly me, I just couldn’t juggle it all. I feel like in a way, I lost myself a little bit this summer. I got caught up in all the fluff of life and I could not keep up. I was mentally falling behind. I am in no way saying I wasted my summer away, because I experienced some of the most amazing moments, but at the same time something just felt off. I mean I haven’t been feeling right. And this isn’t a situation where change is happening. I mean, I feel like a lot has been happening, and I’ve just been stuck living right in it.
I felt lost this summer. In a way where maybe I have lost a bit of self-confidence, or just becoming more doubtful of who I am as a person. I had made room for thoughts and situations that I haven’t necessarily put a lot of energy into in the past. And at the same time of all of this happening, I was also exhausted all the time. So this combination of everything was a whirlpool that I could not escape.
Then summer flew by and I am officially almost two months into my last year of undergrad. AND that is crazy to say. Never did I think that I would enter my last year so quickly and be in the midst of planning the next phase of my life. As stressful as it is, and as challenging as it feels, something about this next phase is going to be so surreal. The thing is that fourth year can truly go two ways; I can either be planning this next transition in my life and have everything pass by and miss these last months with my undergraduate lifestyle, or I can embrace these last months of school with everything I have knowing it won’t last forever but also leaving this chapter feeling fulfilled.
Being away from the blog taught me how much I felt a small void. So coming back, I am feeling like I am getting a hold of some of the things I have been using for my own personal wellbeing. And being able to share my life on this platform is one of the ways I really get the holistic picture of my life.
SO YES, she’s back.
I missed you.
STAY KIND:)
with love
grace <3